I Want To Tell You So Much, I Love You
by SAgleek22
Summary: Rachel and Jesse end up on Broadway together. But how will Finn feel about this? What will Jesse do to make Rachel question her relationship with Finn? Read to find out! St Berry, eventually
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note:** Set 3 years into the future, both Rachel and Finn live in New York (but not together) and have been dating the past 2 years, after Jesse left.

Rachel and Jesse are staring in Spring Awakening, but Finn doesn't know Jesse is in it.

Rachel and Quinn are best friends and Quinn, Puck, and Beth also live in New York.

**Rachel POV**

Quinn, Puck, Beth, Finn and I were walking through Central Park on a beautiful October evening. Puck took Beth to go swing and Quinn, Finn, and me were talking and drinking hot coffee.

"Rach I still can't believe you landed the lead in….what's that play again?" Finn said. "Winter Awakening?"

I rolled my eyes at him "_Spring_ Awakening, Finn."

"Oh yeah, right." He said as Quinn laughed to herself.

"Uh Finn?" I said and he raised his eyebrows. "Can you go get me and Quinn some more coffee?"

"Uh yeah sure, I'll be right back." He turned around and started heading towards the coffee cart.

Quinn just started laughing. "I swear I think he doesn't _ever_ pay attention to anything I say!" I said angrily.

Quinn rolled her eyes before she began to speak. "So when are you going to tell him Jesse's in the play too?"

I groaned. "I don't know. How am I even supposed to bring that up?" I said. "Oh hey Finn, you remember Jesse St James, right? That guy from high school who you totally hated? Yeah him, well he's playing my love interest in this play. Oh and by the way, there's this hot sex scene I'm going to have to do with him too. So what should we have for dinner?"

"Yeah, that might _not_ be the best way to tell him." Quinn said smiling and Finn returned and Quinn motioned for me to tell him.

I decided it might be better to tell him with Quinn around.

"Hey, Finn?" I started.

"Yeah?" He answered.

"About this play….there's something you should know…."I began to say when the worst person possible walked over.

"Hey Rach, Quinn." Jesse St James said walking over to us in the middle of Central Park. Why now? This place was _huge_ how did he happen to be in the _same_ spot at the _same_ time? "Hudson…"He finished.

"_What the hell are you doing here St James?"_ Finn asked angrily, looking like he was going to punch Jesse.

"Uh oh babe, did you forget to tell the _boyfriend_ something?" He said sneering on the word "boyfriend"

"Don't call her babe." Finn said heatedly. "What's going on Rachel?"

"Umm….well, Jesse is in Spring Awakening with me." I muttered quietly.

"Why didn't you tell me this before, Rachel?" Finn said, still glaring at Jesse. I was about to speak, but Jesse answered for me.

"Well, being the moron that you are you probably haven't seen or even know what Spring Awakening is about, do you?" Jesse said. Finn stayed glaring at Jesse but didn't say anything. "That's what I thought. Well, she was probably worried to tell you that I was in this musical, as the lead, of course, because we have a pretty graphic sex scene to do up on stage, every night, and most rehearsals too. The director wants it to be perfect." He finished smirking.

Finn was furious. "Why? Why, Rachel? You should've told me sooner, then letting me hear it from _him._"

"I-I-I didn't think it was that big of a deal." I said quietly.

"You are right Rachel; it isn't that big of a deal acting out a sex scene, when we have had sex before." Jesse said looking at Finn smugly.

"You had sex with him _too!_" Finn said, even angrier if it was possible. "You had sex with _him,_ and you won't do _anything_ with _me?"_

"It was a long time ago Finn." I said.

"Well, I've got to go now. It was a pleasure speaking with you." He said smirking towards Finn. He started walking away but abruptly turned around. "Oh, I'll see you tomorrow at rehearsals Rachel. Can't wait." He said with a smirk still plastered on his face.

He turned and walked away and I turned and looked at Finn who was still glaring at Jesse while he walked away.

"Finn-"I began to say but he stopped me.

"No Rachel, it's okay. I'm still upset you didn't tell me when you found out he'd be in this play, but I guess you were worried how I'd react." He said. "I'm going to go now. I'll call you tomorrow."

Finn turned around and walked away. I turned towards Quinn who was just standing there observing the whole time.

She started to speak. "I think the first thing you said would have gone better than that."

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	2. Chapter 2

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…

**Rachel POV**

Quinn and I stood there finishing our coffee when Beth and Puck came back over from the swings.

"Who was that guy over here?" Puck asked defensively.

"Jesse" I sighed, still overwhelmed.

"St James?" He questioned.

Quinn hit him across the chest. "Puck! What other Jesse would it be? You know he's in that play with Rachel, but Finn didn't know. Well, now he knows."

"He told Finn?" Puck asked and I nodded.

"I'm going to go. It's been a long day." I said. I waved to them as I turned and started walking to my apartment building.

I got up to my apartment and looked at my answering machine. It had three new messages on it. I pressed play and listened to what they said, the first was from my father.

_Hi Honey! Just calling to see how you're doing and how rehearsals are going, have you told Finn about you know who yet? The sooner the better, sweetie. Just tell him, he can't be mad at you, it's not your fault he got cast in this play too._

_ Love you._

I smiled as I listened to the voice of my father. This would've been a little better to hear last night…..

The second message continued to play but this one was from Finn.

_Hey Rach. I just wanted to tell you again I'm not mad at you. I was upset that you didn't tell me about him in the first place but I've forgiven you. Call me tomorrow and we'll go out to eat or something. Love you._

I wasn't sure who the third message would be from, I expected the first two because Finn and I got in a fight and he usually calls after, and my fathers usually call every few days. I was not expecting the voice that came through my answering machine. It was Jesse.

_Hey babe. _(He had gotten in the habit of calling me babe like he did in high school, even when I objected he just laughed. I've learned to stop fighting him about this.) _I just wanted to make sure you were okay; you seemed kind of upset after I left today. I know you miss me so much, but don't worry we will see each other in a few hours. _

I rolled my eyes, same old Jesse…..

I went into my room and changed into my pajamas and crawled into my queen sized bed. As I curled up into my pillow, I could not figure out why I could not get Jesse St James out of my head….

…

I woke after night of tossing and turning in my sleep. I got up and walked into the kitchen and put a pot of coffee on. I went back into my bedroom and grabbed my towels and then went into the small bathroom connected to my bedroom.

I let the hot water massage my back while I tried to think of what I would do.

I soon got out and started getting dressed. I then dried my hair and applied my make up. I grabbed my bag and walked outside and after a few minutes met Quinn at our usual spot.

"Hello, Quinn." I said as she started walking next to me.

"Hey. So anything happen last night when you got home?" She asked me, she always wants the dirt on everything.

"Finn and Jesse both left me messages." I said.

"What'd they say?" She asked excitingly.

"Finn said he wasn't mad and he wants to have dinner tonight." I told her.

"And what did Jesse say?" She asked.

"He just said he was calling to make sure I was okay, that I seemed upset after he left but it would be okay because we'd see each other again in the morning." I told her rolling my eyes.

"Interesting…." She said and I could tell she was thinking of something.

"What are you planning?" I asked her.

"Nothing! But…..do you still like Jesse?" She asked me and my face turned red.

"What! Quinn, I'm dating Finn!" I told her.

"That doesn't answer my questions. Do you still have feelings for Jesse?" She asked again.

"I don't know, maybe!" I said, finally saying it.

"I see." She said and I could really tell she was planning something now, but before I could question her about it we had reached her place of work at the daycare. She quickly made her way inside and yelled a goodbye when she reached the door.

I laughed and started walking again towards the theater. I started to remember back in high school, when Quinn and I hated each other because I was trying to steal Finn from her, I like this a lot better because I really do like Quinn, I love her actually, she's my bestfriend.

Before I knew it I was walking inside. I made my way to my dressing room and put my things down. I was sitting in my chair in front of the mirror; my face was in my hands as I tried to think.

When I sat up I saw _him_, leaning against the door of my dressing room, in the reflection.

"What do you want Jesse?" I asked annoyed.

"Still upset I see." He muttered. I turned towards him and glared.

"You had no right to talk to Finn like that last night." I told him, he sighed.

"He deserved to know, even if he is a douche." He said, I continued to glare at him.

"Finn is not a douche, Jesse." I replied to his remark.

"Oh come on Rach. Are you going to tell me that singing "Jessie's Girl" to you while I was on Spring Break wasn't a douche move?" He said. "We were dating then."

"Well…. I do admit, that was kind of low for him to do, especially while you were out of town. But that has nothing do with now Jesse. It wasn't your place to tell him." I told him.

"Fine, then I apologize. But he did need to know, and maybe it was better coming from me anyway, he already hates me." He replied.

I rolled my eyes and got up to walk away, but when I got to the door he grabbed my wrist and stopped me.

"Jesse stop. Just let me go." I said, using a double meaning in my words. I pulled away from his grip and walked out.

"To bad I can't…." I heard him mumble. But I just kept walking and pretended I didn't hear him.

….

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	3. Chapter 3

Jesse and I went through rehearsals without speaking, besides our roles, but it wasn't Rachel and Jesse talking. After rehearsals were done I quickly left but he caught me before I walked out the door.

He grabbed my wrist and I reluctantly turned towards him.

"Rachel…" He began to say but I cut him off before he could continue.

"What Jesse? What do you want?" I asked firmly.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to grab a bite with me, we've been working here all day and you seemed quite hungry." He said.

Before I could argue my stomach growled, very loudly.

"I'll take that as a yes." He said smiling down at me. I looked away slightly embarrassed but I smiled back at him and nodded. He extended his hand out to me and I walked past him, pushing my hair behind my ear and pretended I didn't see his gesture.

He casually nodded and walked next to me as we walked out the door.

We got to the restaurant and ordered our food. It was awkward at first, but we soon opened up to each other and remembered our time spent together three years ago.

After we finished our dinners the waiter asked if we wanted desserts, we were both too full to order desserts so he gave us the check.

Jesse put down money that covered the whole bill. "Jesse, you don't have to do that. I can pay for my own meal." I said but he put his hand up for me to stop.

"It's okay Rach, I've got it. I think with all I've done I can buy you dinner." He said and I got up ready to say goodbye and leave.

I was about to start speaking but Jesse beat me to it. "Would you like to go on a walk around the park?"

I just stood there for a few seconds before I nodded my head. I don't know why I agreed, but I did. I knew I shouldn't have, during dinner I started to remember those same feelings I did in high school, but I chose to ignore them. I knew this would end badly, but I went anyway.

We walked out of the diner and started walking in the park, we passed a bench and he motioned to sit. I sat down and he at next to me.

"Rach?" He began.

"Yes, Jesse?" I questioned.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly. At first I was a little confused about what he was apologizing for, was it about what happened with Finn? Was it about anything else that happened in rehearsals? Was it him continuing to hit on me, subtly or bluntly everyday? But when I looked into his eyes I knew he was apologizing for what happened three years ago.

"Why?" Was all I could mutter out, and he knew what I was asking.

"I don't know….selfishness, reassurance, anger, pain." He said softly.

"Can you explain all of those?" I asked him and he nodded.

"Selfishness...I needed to make sure I won Regionals, even if it meant hurting you to regain trust with Vocal Adrenaline. Assurance…my scholarship, Rach, I had to get out of Ohio and back to the selfishness; I had to win Regionals to assure my scholarship with UCLA. Anger...I was still upset at you over the Run Joey Run video, I know you apologized and I had forgiven you and understood why you did it, but it still hurt and I wanted to show you some of that hurt, because what happened to you with the eggs was what my heart felt like when I saw that video. What I did to you was just more humiliating." He said and I stared at the ground, not looking in his eyes. "I know I had no right to any of it though, I came into your life for the reason of showing you Shelby was your mother; I wasn't supposed to fall in love." He said, seeming as if he was speaking to himself and not me anymore.

There were a few minutes of quietness before I broke the silence and spoke. "I loved you too." I said softly, finally looking him in the eyes. He looked up at me and stared into my eyes, it seemed like hours passed, but before I knew it he was leaning in towards my lips. His lips got inches apart from mine, he was waiting for me to stop him, but I just couldn't. His cool breath on mine mesmerized me like it did in high school. I couldn't pull myself away and suddenly his lips were gently pressed to mine.

My eyes closed and I felt his hand gently rub through my hair and his other hand rubbing my back.

Our kiss became more aggressive and then I realized where we were, who he was, and what we were doing. I pulled away and he looked at me confused.

"Jesse, I'm sorry but I can't do this." I told him standing up from the bench.

He grabbed hold of my hand and swung it. "Awe, babe it's okay, you were doing great." A smirk appeared on his face and he tried to pull me back onto the bench.

"Please Jesse." I pleaded to him. "I have to go." He sighed and let go of my hand and I turned and left him sitting on the bench.

Once I made it to where he couldn't see me anymore I leaned up against the brick wall of the building right next to me. I was still overwhelmed by the power of his kiss; it felt amazing kissing him as Jesse and not Melchior. Little did I know Jesse was sitting on the bench doing the same thing….

I finally made my way back to my apartment and walked inside. I set my keys and purse down on the counter and walked into the living room to see Quinn sitting there, she had my spare key so I already knew how she got into my apartment.

"Rachel Barbara Berry." She began. "Why were you kissing Jesse St James in Central Park tonight?"

How did she know already? I was going to call her right when I got home anyway, but how did she already know? "How do you know that, Quinn?"

"Puck, Beth, and I were walking through Central Park and we saw you." She said

"When you say _we_, who you do you mean?" I asked nervously.

"Don't worry, Beth didn't see you. Or if she did, she didn't realize it was you." I sighed in relief.

"Thank god. Beth has _the_ biggest mouth, she'd tell Finn about this for sure." I said.

"Are you going to tell him?" Quinn asked quietly.

"I don't know…." I said quietly. Moments of silence passed until Quinn spoke.

"How was it? Kissing him as Jesse?" She asked.

I sighed and my worried face turned into an embarrassed smile. Quinn smiled back at me. "It was amazing, Quinn… I haven't felt like this since high school, I never feel anything like this with Finn….Quinn, what should I do?"

"I can't answer that for you hun, only you can." She said and picked her coat up off the couch and made her way to the door before turning around. "I'll see you in the morning Rach."

I waved to her and walked into my room and buried my face in my pillow.

What am I supposed to do? Why can't this be easy?

I soon fell asleep with the taste of Jesse's lips still on my mouth.

….

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	4. Chapter 4

** One of you had the idea of doing a chapter in Quinn's point of view, I liked this idea so part of this chapter is going to be in Quinn's POV! **

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** Quinn POV**

I left Rachel's apartment and started walking back to my own apartment. When I got in I saw that Puck was already in bed. I walked into Beth's room to check on her. I walked over to her bed and fixed her blankets that were falling off her bed. I gave a gentle kiss on her forehead before I left and closed the door behind me.

I walked into my bedroom to see Puck sound asleep. I went into the drawers, not worrying about being loud because was a _very_ heavy sleeper, and pulled out my pajamas. I went into the bathroom and put them on, washed my face, and brushed my teeth.

I crawled into bed and after about fifteen minutes of tossing and turning I got up and went into the kitchen. I started rummaging through my purse and pulled out a tiny piece of paper, with a phone number on it.

It was the number of Jesse St James, I had taken his number out of Rachel's phone a few days ago, hey you never know when you're going to need it….

It was late so was prepared for him either not to answer, or to be half asleep.

"Hello?" He said groggily, he must've already been asleep.

"Wake up, St James." I said firmly.

"Who is this?" He asked still sounding asleep.

"It's Quinn. Get up, get dressed, and meet me at the Starbucks across from Central Park." I said.

"Quinn? Why? What's wrong?" He asked urgently.

"Just do it." I said and hung up the phone. I put a sweatshirt on and walked outside to the coffee shop, which was just down the street.

He arrived shortly after me and sat down across from me.

"Quinn, it's 1:30. Couldn't this have waited till tomorrow?" He asked sleepily.

"No, it's important. Do you still have feelings for Rachel?' I asked him.

"She's with Finn…." He muttered.

"God, what is it with you two? That doesn't answer my question!" I yelled. "Rachel said the same thing…." I said softly, but he still heard me.

"Yes." He murmured.

"Jesse St James-" I began and he looked up at me. "You are an idiot."

He chuckled quietly. "I know."

...…

**Rachel POV**

Weeks had passed and Finn was mostly over Jesse being in Spring Awakening with me. Jesse and I haven't spoken about what happened that night at the park, we really have barely spoken at all since then.

The time had come for our opening night.

Almost everyone from Glee was coming to see me in my first leading, Broadway role. I assume most of them knew Jesse was also in it, it had been very well advertised and Quinn had probably warned them. I was actually kind of surprised about who all was going to be there. I had been thinking about how all of the Glee members have done after high school.

Finn, he was dating me, living in New York and going to school but he hadn't declared a major yet. Puck and Quinn, also living in New York with their daughter. Kurt, another one living in New York, going to school for fashion design, still very good friends with Mercedes who was working on a record deal with an R and B group. Tina and Artie, now engaged and living in Chicago. Santana and Brittney were both at Ohio State on cheerleading scholarships. Mike was at Julliard for dance. And Matt had, for a reason we don't know, had chosen to go to the University of Oklahoma.

Finn, Puck, Quinn, Beth, Kurt, Mercedes, Tina, Artie, and Mike were all coming for the show.

I was back stage when I saw them arrive and sit in the very front row. I waved to them from behind the curtain before I was pulled to hair and makeup by the director.

I was sort of nervous before going on, not about the lines or the songs. I knew I had those down and they would be wonderful, I was worried about…_the_ _scene_. The scene in this play that would make Finn jump on stage and pummel Jesse.

The lights dimmed and all the talking turned into whispers until to theatre fell completely silent.

I was just about to go on stage and I saw Jesse standing there, he smiled at me, a genuine smile, I smiled back at him and turned away flustered. How can he still do that to me? I asked myself before looking back at him and I saw him smirk.

I went on stage and everything was going perfectly, until _the scene._ Jesse and I were lying there, doing everything like we had in rehearsals, but for one moment in that scene, I saw him look down to the very first row. Directly where Finn was sitting and smirk before his lips attacked mine. I was able to glance down at Finn and see him move uncomfortably in his seat but I was immediately distracted by Jesse's tongue in my mouth.

The scene ended and the lights went dark. We moved backstage, not looking at each other. But when I did glance at him, and caught me looking, I swear I could see he was planning something, and I had an odd feeling it involved me…..

The rest of the play went phenomenally. The time came to take our bows as the audience gave a standing ovation.

Jesse and I, being the leads, went up first to take our bows. We went up holding hands and bowed before the audience while all of my past Glee club cheered the loudest, I smiled down at them then turned and looked at Jesse. Who smiled down at me before he grabbed my waist and pulled me close to him. I looked up at him confused and then his lips attacked mine. We stood up on stage making out while the crowd's applause grew, his hands were rubbing up and down my back and my hands were playing in his curly brown hair.

Once I realized what was going on I pulled away from him, leaving him eyes shut and groaning before looking out to the audience and waving. I looked down to that very front row and saw Quinn with her hands over her mouth looking so excited she was about to jump out of her skin. Finn, however, was furious. His fists were clenched together, his legs were trembling in anger. Everyone else just looked surprised, but they continued to cheer with everyone else.

Jesse and I walked off stage, his arm around my waist. We got behind the curtain and he started walking towards the back of the theater, I followed him as quickly as I could, but then I gave up and grabbed his arm and he turned around with a confused look.

"What was that Jesse?" I asked him heatedly.

"What was what?" He asked playing dumb.

"You know what I am talking about Jesse St James." I replied.

"Oh you mean our little make out session up there?" He asked and I reluctantly nodded. "I was just giving the audience what they wanted." He finished. "And you what you wanted." He added quietly.

"Excuse me?" I asked him angrily.

"Come on Rach, I can tell when you want me." He said smirking and moving closer to me. "Like right now." He said pulling me into another deep kiss.

I gave in. I couldn't fight it any longer, I wrapped my arms around his neck and put my hands back into his hair. While I was twisting his hair in my fingers I started backing up, and he followed.

Pretty soon we I was up against the wall and he had moved his mouth to my neck.

"Jesse." I moaned. He found his way back to my mouth.

"What the hell Rachel!" I heard a voice yell feet away from Jesse and me. I reluctantly pulled away from Jesse and opened my eyes to see Finn, Quinn, and Puck standing there.

"Finn-" I began to say but he was already moving towards us. His fist flew up and hit Jesse in the face, Jesse fell back in surprise and he hit the ground.

"Finn!" I yelled at him and he looked at me furious.

"Rachel, what the hell is going on!" He yelled at me as Jesse got up off the ground and stood next to me.

We looked over and saw Beth standing there with Kurt behind her. When she had seen that we all saw her she immediately ran over to Quinn who picked her up.

"Aunt Rachel?" She asked.

"Yes Bethie?" I replied nervously.

"Why do you keep kissing the boy with the pretty voice?" She asked. Shit. This won't be good.

"What you mean Beth?" Puck asked her.

"Well, Aunt Rachel, you kissed up there on stage all night, _and_ right here when we all walked in, _and_ in the park." She said confidently. Jeeze Beth I love you but you have _the biggest mouth._

"In the park?" Finn asked even angrier.

"You said she didn't see that…." I muttered to Quinn who looked apologetic.  
"She's getting smarter…..she didn't tell us she saw you…." Quinn muttered back to my remark.

"Rachel if you're just going to make out with this douche all the time why are we still dating?" He asked. I was left speechless and couldn't say a single word. "Let me answer that for you, we're not." He said and with that he turned and walked out of the building, and out of my life.

** Well what'd you think? I actually liked how this chapter came out…..let me know how you felt tho! **

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	5. Chapter 5

** Thank you all for your wonderful reviews! And I encourage you to keep reviewing after this chapter :]**

** Rachel POV**

"Finn!" I called after him, but it was too late. He was gone. Quinn came over and gave me a hug. "He's gone…." I muttered under my breath only for Quinn to hear.

"Aunt Rachel, did I do something wrong? Did I make Finn mad?" Beth asked and I looked at her worried face, she was about to bust into tears. I walked over and picked her up and gave her a hug.

"No Bethie it wasn't your fault, it was mine." I said tears streaming down my face.

Beth sighed in relief and I put her down and she ran to Puck. Jesse was still standing there awkwardly.

"We'll leave you two to talk." Puck said sensing what Jesse was feeling. He carried Beth out and Quinn followed giving me a hopeful look as she walked out the door.

I walked towards Jesse and he looked up from the ground and smirked at me. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Look Jesse, I don't know what you're thinking but just because Finn and I broke up does _not_ mean I am going to rush into a relationship with you." I said firmly.

"Okay." He said and I was a little taken back.

"Okay? Alright, I have to say I'm impressed Jesse. I thought you might be a little more upset about this." I told him, a little disappointed.

"Rachel don't you see?" He asked and I looked at him confused and he started walking towards me again getting closer and closer. "Just because we're not in a relationship doesn't mean we can't still do this." He finished bringing his face inches away from mine, his cool breath taking over me until his lips gently pressed to mine. My eyes closed and I waited for more but after a few seconds he pulled away.

"And with that oaf no longer tying you down, we'll be together soon enough. You won't be able to resist my charm anymore. I think you've already proved that." He said smirking and walking away leaving me standing there looking back at him.

I got back to my apartment and when I walked in I pulled out my cell phone only to see I had six missed calls, all from Quinn.

I dialed her number and she answered after the first ring.

"What happened with Jesse?" She asked, not even bothering to say hello.

"Hello to you to Quinn." I said laughing.

"Hi, now tell me what happened!" She said sounding just as excited as she looked when Jesse and I kissed on stage after the play was over.

"Quinn can this wait till tomorrow? I'm really tired." I told her.

"Give me a summary right now and details tomorrow." She said firmly, I rolled my eyes and sighed before I began speaking. "Nothing really happened, after you guys left I told him I wasn't going to rush into a relationship with him and he kissed me again and said it would happen soon enough because I wouldn't be able to resist him." I told her.

"Wow, same arrogant Jesse, huh?" She asked. I laughed.

"Yeah it is." I began. "But I think that's one of the reasons I'm in love with him." I finished very quietly, but I knew Quinn heard me.

"Rach you get some sleep and I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" She said after moments of silence.

"Alright, bye Quinn." I said and hung up the phone. I went into my bedroom and put on my favorite pair of sweats and curled up on the couch in the living room and turned on the news.

_"In recent news, the new Broadway Show sweeping New York premiered tonight and got very good reviews. Spring Awakening starring Rachel Berry and Jesse St James went over phenomenally with the critics, but one strange thing happened. After the show was over and the two leads went to take their bows they had a pretty heated kiss up there on stage. What does this mean, you may ask? Are the two Broadway stars together; was this just a publicity stunt? I think only the two leads know."_

_ "Back to you Jan." _

_ "Alright, thank you Diana for your report on new entertainment! Now for the weather coming up this we-" _

After hearing that I quickly turned off the television. I snapped my head back to the cushion on the couch and put a pillow over my face and screamed.

"What am I going to do?" I whispered to my self. I laid there thinking of everything that had happened that night, and everything that was going to happen because of it.

**Quinn POV**

"She loves him!" I yelled walking into the room looking at Puck and he looked up from his guitar and just stared at me.

"Who loves who, hun?" He asked.

"Rachel! Rachel loves Jesse! She just told me." I yelled at him.

"Okay…..?" He said and still looked confused and went back to playing his guitar.

"Why aren't you as intrigued in this as I am!" I yelled at him.

"Because I already knew it. Plus it's _not_ really my business." He told me looking up from his guitar again.

"But we're her best friends! It _is_ our business!" I yelled angrily at him. I picked up my phone and Jesse's number and walked back into our bedroom.

"Hello?" He asked normally, good he wasn't asleep yet. But it was only 9:30 so I didn't think he would be.

"St James, meet me at that Starbucks again, we've got more stuff to talk about mostly concerning tonight." I said firmly, not giving him a choice.

"Quinn?" He asked.

"Who do you think it is moron?" I yelled back at him.

"Alright, Quinn. I'll be there in fifteen minutes." He said and I hung up the phone.

I walked back into the living room and grabbed a jacket and my purse.

"Beth! It's bedtime, put all your toys away and put your pajamas on. Daddy's tucking you into tonight." I yelled and Puck looked up at me but he understood where I was going.

I got to the coffee shop and sat down at the same table we sat last time. He arrived five minutes after I did and sat down across from me.

"Are we going to make this a regular thing, Quinn?" He said with a smirk.

"Shut it St James. We need to talk." I told him and the smirk disappeared to a serious look. "What was that stunt tonight about?" He shrugged his shoulders, but didn't speak. "I swear to god Jesse, if you break her heart again I will literally beat the shit out of you."  
That smirk reappeared on his face. "Literally?"

"Ugh. God. _You are impossible._ No _not_ literally, but I _will_ hurt you." I told him and he raised his eyebrows and left the smirk etched on his face, but he didn't say anything. He just stared at me. "God! You are so annoying Jesse." I yelled and then under my breath I said "How does Rachel love you?"

He heard me…..

"Excuse me?" He asked. Hmm, if he's going to act like this so can I.

"Rachel l-" I stopped mid-word. "Never mind." I got up and started walking out.

"Oh come on Quinn!" He yelled after me and I turned back around.

"I don't think so St James. But I will tell you this-"I began and he raised his eyebrows. "If you're just doing this to capture a conquest you never got in high school, don't do it. You don't know what will happen to her if she lets you back in and you walk out again. You didn't see her after you left the first time. If she's just another girl to you, just leave her alone."

I started walking towards the door again and right before I walked out I heard him whisper, "She's not…."

I kept walking outside and when I got to the street I looked up at the stars and breathed in the cold December air. "I know, Jesse."

...

...

** Review :)**


	6. Chapter 6

** Jesse POV**

I left the coffee shop and started walking back to my apartment, my head was spinning. I was thinking about everything that Quinn said. I thought I heard what she said, but was I wrong? She wouldn't repeat herself, but I could've sworn she said _how does Rachel love you?_ Does Rachel still love me? Did she ever? Do I love Rachel? Did I ever?

There was only a few of those questions I could answer, Rachel would have answer them for me.

Does Rachel still love me? Only she can answer that. Did she ever? I _think_ so, but I can't be sure. Again, only she can answer that. Do I love Rachel? Yes…..I do. I admit it, I guess that's the first step, admitting it to myself. I, Jesse St James, am in love with Rachel Berry. Did I ever? I don't think I ever stopped, from the first moment I heard her sing, to the first time I sang with her, to the first time I kissed her, to the time she broke my heart, and to the time I broke hers.

I lied to her. Over and over again, how could she ever forgive me, let alone love me again? But…..did _she_ ever stop?

**Puck POV**

Beth had finally fallen asleep. She kept asking where Quinn was.

After singing her to sleep I went back out into the living room, waiting for Quinn to get home. I continued to play my guitar when Quinn walked in the door slamming her keys on the counter and growling as she stomped angrily into our bedroom.

I sighed and got up and followed her. "Babe?" I said quietly.

"What?" She snapped angrily.

"What happened?" I asked her, hoping not to get screamed at.

"What happened? Well, our best friend is in love with a douche!" She yelled back at her and I tried to get her to quiet down because Beth was asleep.

"Jesse? What'd he do? I thought he was pretty cool. I know we hated him in high school, but that was just good old fashioned rivalry. I didn't actually know him." I said.

"Yes Jesse! Who else do you think! Finn? Rachel didn't _really_ love Finn, she just tried to convince herself she did." She said heatedly. "And you asked what he did? He's just so impossible! I can't get through to him, he never gives me a straight answer, it's infuriating!" I laid down on the bed next to her and rubbed her arm. "And you don't know him _now_ Noah Puckerman! How can you say you like him now, and you only didn't like him in high school because he was in Vocal Adrenaline? Do you only like him because he chased Finn off? Because you haven't liked him since he tried to win me back in high school _while_ dating Rachel"

"Babe, calm down. He just seems like a cool guy, okay?" I said trying to calm her down. "And you know I haven't liked Finn since that. I just put up with him because of Rach. I didn't want to see her hurt again, after the whole Jesse thing. But we both knew he was off in California, and, I will deny it if you ever tell Rachel or Jesse this, even in high school I kind of preferred Jesse for Rachel., but after he left I couldn't see her hurt like that again. She about died after Jesse cracked that egg on her forehead, if she found out Finn was trying to get back with _you_, her best friend, while he was still with _her_, it would have sent her over the edge."

She nodded in agreement. "You're right, you're right. But please go, I have to call Rachel."

"Hon, it's midnight. Don't you think she'll be asleep?" I said.

"I don't care." She said picking her phone up and shooing me out of the room. I pretended to walk into the living room again, but I really leaned on the wall outside our room to hear what Quinn was going to say to Rachel.

_"Rachel! Wake up, now!" _Ugh, Quinn's gotten a lot more assertive lately.

_"I don't care how late it is, we need to talk!" _I rolled my eyes.

_"Did you talk to Jesse tonight?" _

_ "I don't know why! I was just wondering, after everything that happened I didn't know if he said anything to you"._

_ "Fine, we'll talk tomorrow. Goodnight."_ I heard the phone click and Quinn groan. I walked into the living room and sat back down and watched Quinn come out, and go straight into the kitchen and pull a beer out of the fridge.

I just looked at her with a smirk on my face.

"Shut it, Puckerman."

**Jesse POV**

I laid in bed staring at the ceiling in complete silence. Just thinking.

How is she doing this to me? She's just a girl. Scratch that, she's not just _a_ girl, she's _the_ girl. The girl I'm in love with, the girl I'm going to marry. I was sure of it. Even if she wasn't.

How can I prove to her that what we have is real? That it's not just a game, nor was it in high school. How can I prove it to her?

I have to show her, I can't wait any longer.

I got up and put a shirt on and went in the bathroom and splashed ice cold water on my face.

_Let's go St James, you can do this._

I walked out of my bedroom and grabbed a coat and walked out into the cold December air and started walking to Rachel's apartment.

I got there in twenty minutes and started walking up to her floor. I reached her floor, and soon found the room with the number twenty-two on it. Her door.

I took a deep breath and raised my hand to knock but quickly lowered it.

What if she's asleep and she's incoherent? What if she wants nothing to do with me? What if she slams the door in my face and never wants to see me again. What if _Finn_ answers the door and they've gotten back together, and I'm just standing out here looking like a dumbass.

_You can't worry about that now, you'll forever regret it if you leave now. Just do it, you are freaking Jesse St James. Nothing scares you, nothing makes you nervous…..nothing except a certain Rachel Berry._

I knocked on the door and then shoved my hands in my pockets and took another deep breath, I saw a light flash on from the crack on the bottom of her door. She was awake, she was coming. Or at least I hoped it was her.

I heard the lock turn and soon the door swung open. She was yawning and was only wearing a short, satin, black robe.

"Quinn, I told you I'd talk to you tomor-" She began before opening her eyes all the way to see who was standing there. "Jesse?"

. . . . . . . . . . . .

**I'm so sorry it took me so long to update this. I've had ideas with other stories and have been working on those, and had writers block with this story. I'm also sorry this was so short, but I just wanted to get it uploaded. **

** I have been really busy lately and have had a lot of stuff going on.**

** I just got back from a week's vacation visiting my sister and she doesn't have a computer so I couldn't work on it there, and I've had a lot of volleyball practices, and working.**

** I've also been really upset lately, because a really good friend of the family, he's like my uncle, his daughter was best friends with my sister while they were in grade school and high school and my parents and him and his wife have always been really close friends. I mean I know I can count on him for anything, and I can trust him, me and my sisters used to stay the night at their house when my parents would have to go out of town.**

** Well, last weekend, he was diagnosed with ALS, or more commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease. It has no cure. And we don't know how long he has to live, I did some research and about 50% of people with this live from 3-5 years from their diagnoses, but we're hoping since he's a little bit younger than the average people that get it that he'll have longer to live.**

** He's not as upset about as his family because he knows he's going to heaven. He's not scared of death, but more of what his death will do to the people he loves. He's scared he'll miss his son's wedding, he just had a grandchild. **

** But I've just been really emotional, crying when I go to sleep, so if you could pray for him it would be greatly appreciated. **


	7. Chapter 7

** Rachel POV**

"What are you doing here? It's twelve-thirty at night!" I said quickly, suddenly feeling self conscious in front of him with only my robe on.

"I just had to see you Rachel. Can I come in?" He asked pleadingly.

I nodded and opened the door a little more so he had enough room to come in.

He looked around and then looked back at me. "This is nice, very…..you." He finished with a smile.

I smiled back, "Thanks." And then came the awkward silence. "Jesse," I began, but stopped, and he didn't make a sign that he noticed that I was speaking.

"Catch the news tonight?" He asked smugly.

I laughed quietly, "Yes I did. Publicity stunt, of course."

"Sure, keep telling yourself that Rach." He said looking up at me with a smirk. I laughed again, but neither of us spoke.

Time passed and the question I wasn't able to spit out was torturing my mind. Finally I worked up enough courage to ask him, "Jesse why are you here?"

He sighed before speaking. "I don't know. I had to see you." I was staring at the floor but I could feel his gaze burning my skin. "Rach, I'm sorry."

I looked up at him, "For what?"

"I was a jerk to you tonight. No, I've been a jerk to you since we started working on Spring Awakening." I didn't speak, I just stared at him. "I'm sorry I kissed you tonight"

"I'm not." I muttered quietly.

"What?" He asked confused.

"I knew it was over with Finn for awhile, I just didn't have the guts to end it."

"Why was it over with him?"

"I couldn't deny my feelings for you anymore."

More silence came, was it really this awkward for us in high school?

"What are we doing, Rach?"

"What do you want to do?" I asked him nervously.

"I want to be with you." He said simply.

"I want to be with you too."

"Really?" He asked with his eyebrows raised.

"Yes, why?" I asked.

"Because you said tonight you weren't going to rush into a relationship with me."

"I lied." I said simply and he raised his eyebrows again, "I didn't want to seem like a tramp for breaking up with Finn and then running into your arms."

**Puck POV**

I watched Quinn down her beer, she hadn't done that in awhile….then again she usually only drank when she was irritated.

"What'd Rachel say, hun?" I asked her, and she gave me a stern look.

"Nothing good." She replied shortly.

"What's wrong?" I asked her sighing.

"It's just- they both just-" She started saying but couldn't get it out.

"Spit it out." I said laughing.

"Shut up Noah!" She yelled.

"Shh, you'll wake Beth up." I whispered standing up and walking towards her.

"I know, I'm sorry. They both just make me so mad! They both love each other, but they won't do anything about it! It drives me crazy!"

"Why does it drive you crazy? It's not your life."

"Because it is so stupid when two people are meant for each other and they won't do anything about it!" Seriously." She said and I chuckled quietly. "Why are you laughing at me!"

"I just find it funny that you are freaking out about this." I said and she frowned. "Come on, don't do that. You and I both know it's going to happen, we knew the moment she told us he was in that play with her. Just give it some time Quinn."

"You're right. But I'm just going to be obsessing over it, I need something to keep me busy until it happens."

"Maybe I can help with that." I said and she raised her eyebrows.

"And what would that be?" She asked curiously.

"I love you, Quinn." I said spontaneously. She scrunched her eyebrows in confusion.

"I love you too, Noah. But what does that have to do with keeping me busy?" She asked.

"I figured you could plan something." I said staring at the floor.

"And what would that be?" She replied.

I felt the small box in my pocket, waiting to be pulled out. "A wedding." I said quietly.

"What?" She replied out of breath.

I got down on my knee and took her hand in mine. "Quinn Frabray, will you marry me?"

**Jesse POV**

Did she really say she wanted to be with me? Or was this all a dream, was I just hallucinating? Only one way to find out…..

"You're not a tramp, Rach." I said and she laughed. It was real, she does want to be with me. "If we're going to do this, I want to do it right."

"I do too, Jess."

"Then let me start out by saying, Rachel Barbara Berry, will you be my girlfriend?"

She broke out into a smile and ran to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face into my chest.

She pulled away and looked me in the eyes. I pushed a few strands of hair behind her ears, but didn't break eye contact.

I slowly started leaning down towards her lips and she closed her eyes. I gently pressed my lips to hers.

She ran her fingers through my hair, the way she knew drove me crazy. I moved my hands up and down her back, moaning as she stuck her tongue in my mouth. I held her hips and pulled her closer to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and jumped up, wrapping her legs around my waist.

I moved over a few steps and pushed her back against the wall. She was pulling at my t-shirt and eventually slid it over my head as I moved my lips to her neck and right under her year, where I remembered she loved to be kissed.

We were suddenly interrupted by a loud banging of the door.

She looked over at it, "It's one in the morning! Who could be knocking on my door this late?"

"Probably Quinn, she has a thing of dragging people out late at night." She looked at me confused and opened her mouth to speak but she was drowned out by another loud bang at the door. "Go ahead and get it. I doubt she'll go away."

She smiled at me and I moved away from the wall and let her down. She turned slightly pink but went to the door.

She opened it widely, expecting it to be Quinn.

She gasped. "Finn?"


End file.
